On a bitter-sweet year just passed....

One more year.... older by one more year... my b'day again... the first one in chennai....

I remember my last b'day in Hyderabad... it was a fun filled as well as teary day indeed... fun with all the friends around... teary; yeah, the same reason...

The year just passed was of mixed feelings.... painful as well as happy.... leaving all my friends was unbearable... leaving hyd... leaving all my buddies were indeed highlighting in the whole of year... chennai days were painful at first... slowly, i learned the place, people and blended in... work went on fine...

There were reasons to smile the end of a day... as well was reasons that brought tears to my eyes... Thatz what life is all about... it can never be sweet always.... we can enjoy the sweetness only if we ever experienced the bitterness... We will appreciate heights only if we have fallen to the bottom... A rise from fall is always memorable... It was an year that gave me strength for a rise like that, and i will remember the past year for so many reasons....

To the coming year... no more special thoughts... no promises.... no prayer for changes.... just want to be the way i'm... 'cos i love the way i am.... and i am happy....

Thanking the lord for all the happiness and good health an year brought to me.... and 'happy b'day me'... :D

Cool, Cozy sunday.... thanks to Jal!!!

Cool and Cozy and Chennai!!!... we can ever expect a combo like that.... except for cyclone rainy days... Yesterday was the day for cyclone Jal!!...

Locked up in my house whole day, missed the church.... 'cos the roads were 'flooded' and dangerous... along with rain, heavy wind... and that cause some power fluctuations and cable connection errs.... Blessing in disguise may be, enjoyed the coziness with some reading and writing (what i missed for a long long time)... One half-read book finally done... and finished some pages in 'an yellow note-pad'... :-).... satisfying... truly satisfying....

Late night news showed some destruction by the cyclone... that was the sad part of the whole day... cyclones, anywhere, plz send only rains... dont come and take lives...

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pic above: rain inspired, rain-themed wallpaper i downloaded...

Refreshing time 4 some hcu stories....

It's always refresh the old memories; beautiful or not so beautiful.... i was missing all those hcu fun except for the occasional visit to hyd... and couple of visits by friends here over few days... it was fun talking about 'those days'....

For over a month, i was out of touch with all 'hyderabadies'... then came chaitanya's invite for a lunch at his place... Chaitanya was my colleague during phd... and he is in chennai with his wife now... Talked endlessly about the old and new department stories... those troubled times of research and a bit of fun inbetween.... i always say i miss the fun days... but i do miss those tension-some days in my Phd too... the troubles with ur colleagues, bosses and all... those will also be memorable...

When u say u enjoy life; it include the bitter side too... 'cos its that bitterness that makes the better times 'better or best'....

Well, the point to underline is lunch was awesome... enjoyed a telugu meal after a long time... and for me, it was a nice break from my 'home-lab schedule'...

Trouble days... fun days... sick days... a month just passed by...

A month away from blogging... it was a busy month indeed.... started all even b4 with my NOVA breaking down completely and had to abandon it finally for a new activa... jet black bike again... never wanted to buy a bike in chennai, but had no other option... walking/going by auto in chennai is indeed risy/costly... u can risk ur life walking on road... drivers are reckless at this side of the world... so do autowallahs, ur one month salary will go down in their pockets if u rely on them... so decided to get a new one... my NOVA is still @ home, dont know yet what to do with it.... most probable thing is give it off to some mechanic and cancel the registration... sigh...

inbetween, had a blast in hyderbad... went to have a get together with my buddies sushilji sampy... and ofcourse jacob... shopped day after day... dined with misfits and had lots of biriyani... fun week-end... never wanted to end...

all these followed by sick days... i dont like to fall sick... especially cold... it just sucks... thank god for a couple of days Vitso was in chennai to give me company... finally, i got to hit the chennai beach with her... i went ther with some cold and fever, even in sickness, had fun...

well, with all these around, had a handful of work too... APP had given me a load to finish in a week... just finished a calculation... wherever u go, APP and channeling wil always follow me...

and yesterday i celebrated one year anniversary of my phd viva... one yr since i became Dr... i'm chennai, no chance i partyd... just another sunday @ home...

back to work... well and good... it will be october soon.. time flies... none can stop that....

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pic above : my new activa....

Spammers' pleasures...

Wondered anytime who are the ones following you in twitter or sending facebook invites... or in past orkut invites???? all we know that there are some online junkies, jobless who creates fake ids and enter into everybody's friendslist and all... but the real question is why??? If the pleasure is to interact with more people, why 1000s in ur list....

I was watching the crime series 'criminal minds' for the past few weeks, so whenever i get a 'follow' request from an acc, i tend to consider them as criminals, who sneak into our lives and our friends, read our blogs and they get more ideas for more fake acc... they learn our personal lives... thatz weird... and we r not the only ones they are following... cant just understand the logic... 'why'....

Even now, when i took a glance to my twitter page, some1 started following me... glad there is something called 'report spam' in the online world...

Was reading an article in IBNlive regarding the hackers and crackers... their worst fears and all... hackers and crackers are mostly interested in 'big stuffs' like govt/company websites... stealing credit card details... but what about spammers... disturbing personal pages in social networking and all... what they earn.... only a spammer can answer that Q...

When I looked up...

Last few days in chennai it was rain all over... Nobody expected a july/august shower in the city... i was told by some colleagues that rain in chennai will b november or december... unexpected climate chane; but i was excited...

But the excitement is when i am in my home and no more humidity disturbing my sleep... You go outside, its not a good feeling at all... dirty roads, water clogging... its not a good feeling... even when you are riding, u need to be careful enough to miss the craters in the roads and all... when i ride i try to avoid even the other vehicles, i dont want to get a splash from the dirty water.... so you have to focus ur attention to the road only when u ride here... And when you look down and ride; yeah yeah... all dirt... hmm...

But last day was diff, i was coming home a bit early... it was not heavy rain... traffic was less... i was scanning the road and riding slowly... when i felt no more danger from water, i looked up, to have some fresh air.... i had just turned to the Lake side, man... the beautiful sky i have ever seen in chennai... cloudy still... gray strokes on a blue sky.... it was like a piece of work.... couldnt help slow down and enjoy the scene....

Hmm... couldnt take a pic of it... the traffic never slows down permanently.... Vehicles started pouring in... and i rode faster to home... but couldnt leave that picture from my mind....

Beautiful beautiful is this place around.... but u need to keep ur eyes off from the negative aspects of life to enjoy the goodness around.... Well, the recipe for happiness is simple; all you have to do is look away from the dark sides and look up to the bright sides; thatz what is called staying positive.... a lesson learned in rain...

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The pic above is downloaded from web, not my pic...

Enjoying this chatter patter....

Finally its raining... raining in chennai...

Good bye for a while to the humid days and nights... finally, finally could sleep in peace...

But its not a beautiful rain as i could feel in kerala or in the campus... rain in chennai means dirty and flooding rods, never keep ur feet down on the road... thatz chennai.... beware...

But whatever, clean campus... green trees... all fresh around... some cool weather.... thatz all i wanted...

Enjoying this chitter patter for the while... i know after sometime the humidity is back on track....

Cant just wait 4 a few seconds!!??

After riding through 'reckless' hyderabadi traffic for 3 years, in my memory i was never close to any kinds of accidents... or even 'close shaves'... even when people say hyderabadies are worst in obeying traffic rules... there were moments i had cursed some of the auto-wallahs or even pedestrians.... Now, after coming to chennai i feel, they were all saints...

The traffic in chennai... hell.... and the way people obey it worse than hell... every day atleast once i do feel, 'ok, i'm done'... close to too many accidents here.... mostly by the signal... people cant just wait for the signal to go green... i am surprised at the fact that most of the signal jumping are by the bus drivers... and other 4 wheelers... a bike sneaking through is common everywhere, but the big vehicles!!!! Nobody bothers to wait a few seconds, what are they hurrying upto; wondering any1 in their deathbeds, so that they can see their face for the one last time... i dont think so.... Its in the blood to break rules... or else none will risk their life for saving few seconds...

I had lost my cool many times at the drivers who bang their horn on me for not jumping and moving ahead of the signal.... Is it a common tendency in chennai to break the traffic rules... i never see a traffic policeman on my route to campus... and people make the most of it... we cant teach any1 a lesson in this case, but there should be a common sense and wisdom in drivers... or else.... they will end up learning a lesson all my themselves...

Random Scribbles : Tribute to the 64th Independence day...

63 years after independence... how many more years to go for real independence...

Aug 15 tomorrow, it will be our 64th independence day... 63 years after the midnight speech from Pandit Nehru, do we really feel we are free... do we really feel safe... do we really trust our leaders, the law enforcement, the judiciary... NO... i dont think anyone is 100% happy in this country...

Switch on the TV news channels in the morning... they start with scams and end with murders... that's the state of the nation for us... Did the freedom fighters ever imagine all their hard work and sacrifice one day lead to this...

Well, the truth is this is not just our story.... there are many countries struggle to cope with violence and corruption, we can just say we are far better.... But the thing to be remembered is we claim to be the biggest democracy and indeed we are the largest populated in the world (almost)... so whatever happen here is large... we cant compare our state to a corrupt small nation and claim we are better... the world expect a lot from us... and how are we keeping that expectation...

For example... the common wealth games, it turned out to b corrupt wealth games; we got a chance to show our capabilities, but got messed up... Look at the naxal woes in many states; some people have reasons to kill others and some other people have reason to support those killings.... And more worries on the language issues... why cant we stand our neighbour just because he or she speaks a different language.... The diversity of the country, once we were so proud, now is a reason for border fights... even language cant keep folks together... Andhra Pradesh gives us best examples... I think after 10 years the number of states in India will cross 50, considering the demands and activisms going on in many parts of the country....

Well, i can go on and on... listing out my own frustration on the system... but can I really think it will all be fixed... it will take a huge revolution to make a change in this country... a whole new freedom struggle... a freedom from the corrupt politicians... freedom from the silence we are forced to keep against the atrocities... And how long its gonna take for us to attain that freedom... only god knows... may be it will take a whole generation or generations... whatever time it takes, the struggle should start... should start from each of us... from today... may be tomorrow will b day we breath freely in this country...

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Random thoughts.... apologies on the lack of order....

What I WANT vs What I NEED...

Week-ends in Chennai for me are 'movie days'... finish off all the week's downloads in one and half days... gone are the hyderabadi week-ends full of shoppings and outings... better i not mention that part again...

This week-end 'Confessions of a Shopaholic' happened to be in my list... wanted to watch that for a while, considering myself as a shopaholic.... well, the movie was terrible.... didnt stand out... The only one point it stressed 'are we really make decisions between 'what we really want' and 'what we really need'...

There are a hundred or thousand things in the world we desire on... human desires are never ending... Put me in mall with lot of cash in my card or purse... i can empty them in hours... 'cos there are a lot of things i want... thatz just human... But if i ask myself 'do i really need all these?'... may be not... We tend to spend on and on... every commercial in the TV tempt as to throw money on stuff which are not really necessary.... The only solution to this is nothing other than 'self control'... which many like me lack....

This week-end I had a difficult situation at the Mobile Store... I wanted one particular model of phone... that was in mind for a long time... but what i really needed according to my two brothers who were on phone with all the time was another one... Usually none can change my mind easily, even its difficult for me... but i did it.... gave in to desire, and bought the one which i really needed... i'm happy (next day only) so do my brothers... I watched the movie after this episode in the Store, I felt happy, I managed to make the right choice...

The world around is so tempting... it's upto us with our on choices not to fall into all the temptations... Every time u r in a dilemma, ask urself 'do i really need this?'... All you have to make is a right choice between what you really want and what you really need....

As the days fly...

As the days fly...

Forgetting the promises to keep...

Unfinished letters in my drawer... Unfinished paintings...

Promises to call... promises to write... all unkept...

There was a song to write... but i can’t remember it now...

I wanted to catch a rainbow... but I don’t want to search for it now...

As the days fly...

I’m forgetting the real me...

Dont Bug me or Bribe me... 'cos its never gonna work....

This blog should have been posted few months back... The motivation behind this is many, dont want to list it all... Well, most of my Yahoo 360 buddies know I blog quite personal... its all me in my blogs.... and this is one topic i never mentioned... Infact the people around me, my close friends know about this side of me... the tough side of me... or strong side of me; THAT I STAND BY MY WORDS...

No bribe, no bugings... or beggings... or pesterings... never work on me... I dont remember me pestering any1 for anything; may be when I was little, and innocent... ask once, end of the story...This is how I role and this is what i learned from the opportunistic world around me... One way or other we have to be strong in our words and action... It doesnt mean to be selfish... it means we are not letting others to take advantage of the soft side of us...

Well, this is the thought of the day for me... nothing new, may be a reminder... (LOL)....

Cheers...

Juby

No more jokes.... 'cos jogging days are back....

No more joking on jogging... finally started (re-started) my morning jogs... all those lazy mornings are now history...

Got up at 5.45... hit the road by 6.00...

Didnt want to exert too much on the first day... so the jog time was just 45 minuts; the running part 20 mnts... need to increase the time slowly... The Velacherry roads are bit dusty and a lot smelly thanks to the number of garbage bins near the lakeside... the lake is not that a beauty from end to end... will try taking some snaps next time, need to carry my moto too... May be i can change the route tomorrow, its a chance to know the roads too.... why to jog on the road I ride to institute everyday... ahh... so many plans... i can make it work... hope i do....

Well, getting up and starting the day at 6.00 is an achievement considering how lazy i was all these days/weeks/months... After leaving hyderabad life was without football or any kind of exercise... put on weight (my friends will laugh at me if i say so... but in my calculator its 'weight'), and i felt stuffed in.... Back to old ways, my ways.... Now the next step for me; find some football buddies over here... missing kicking around... running around... falling down... and (not) getting injured (lol).... Cant expect everything to happen on the same day or the same time i wanted to... new place, it may take some time... but I wanna stay positive... thatz what i am focusing on now... till then, keep myself from not becoming lazy again....

We do really leave old friends....

Today is friendship days.... cant wind up the day without penning down some thoughts on the day... We Indians symbolize so many of 'Days' following the west, but a day like this do make us feel so nostalgic about school days, college days... but the question is so we really miss our old friends?? really??

When I was i college i thought i will definitely miss my school friends.... but i made new friends, did move on.. thought the same thing in university, thought my college friends were my best friends in life... i could make more friends in the university... now i do really miss my HCU friends... it may be a temporary feeling... after a couple of years may be u feel the same 'moved on' feeling about hcu...

The point really is we do really leave our old friends, how muchever we say 'friends for ever', one day or other we leave them, unless they turn out to be colleague ir neighbors; thatz a diff story.... Leaving a friend doesnt mean we forget them, it just means we make new friends, and have more and more friends... we move on... thatz what life is....

I have memories good and bad on friendship day.... from hospital bed to high tea parties in hyd... those are unforgettable... and this year... with my family... travelling a lot with no celebration...

Whatever the ways to celebrate, I am happy I have a wide spectra of people as friends... and i love them all....

Happy Friendship Day....

Taking a break....

Finally a break... going home for the week-end... No more bike worries... no more work worries for the next 3 days... just wanna sit at home... play with Noel... eat and sleep... and of course shopping....

After a nerve breaking week full of work and off-work issues, i think i am drained of all energy... need a refill.. glad that i decided to go home instead of staying here and watching movies...

well, will come back with lots of home-goodies and photoes.... and may be a blog too..... :-)

Inserting a video i was watching over and over again today....

Big Bang Theory S01,02,03 all done in one week-end...

Ask me how many movies i watched in total when i was home in kerala from march-april....i think i spent twice that time watching big bang theory whole week-end... Think i have addicted to this series, finished season, cant wait for season 4 now... seems like its release is in September....

Its all about bunch of physicist hanging around talking abt the world thru physics terms.. thought it wont be of my type series, but fell in love with it.... hilarious... especially Dr. Cooper.... the producers say they cant imagine putting a girlfriend or boy friend or even a 'friend with benefits' is impossible for the character.... but love to see a story like that in the next season...

A physicist's life is not like always.... I cant imagine myself living in a life like that.... but its not that bad afterall... we will survive....

Broken bike breaking my heart...

It was one of the heart breaking sights; once on road as a beast now at the mechanic's with its parts scattered all over... that was my bike.... sigh sigh sigh...

I had given my Nova for a complete treatment.... it turned out to be a long process to fix all the broken parts inside... according to the mechanic the bike is indeed in a bad shape, he was wondering how i was riding... i can ride; i know my bike... afterall its mine... we are bonded ;-)....

Well, every1 had to fall one day to realize how it feels to be in ground... but we will rise again... and ride again... soon (i hope so)... 'cos life without my bike here in chennai is horrible... dirty dusty roads.... greedy autowalls.... it all evil around.... hmm......

Keeping some 'good ol days' pics....

I got it like that... look at that 'L'....

Sharpening my culinary talents....

What gives someone the motivation to cook?

For some people its a task of the day.... for someone its the job... for some its an art... everyone has got their own motivations in fact....

Ask me whether I loved cooking 10 years back... nope!!! i hated it.... The reason was I was at home... and under the shadow of the really 'expert' cook; my mom... i was just a helper... I love helping, but love to do the 'big big things' more than helping.... 'Cos a helper in a kitchen always gets the criticism if something comes good too... The first cake i bakes 11 years back was received with more criticism than appreciation...

Ask me now... yeah... its a great feeling.... That's the feeling i started getting from my Masid Banda home in hyderabad.... I found i really enjoy cooking there and i found i have got fans in my cooking... well, atleast jacob and sampy keep visiting me frequently... I dont remember exactly when i really started enjoying being in kitchen... but well, its all an art now.... I have downloaded a number of recipes... modified some... made that as mine....

I dont know how many people enjoy watching series like Top Chef.... but for me its one of the best.... well, i will never be competing in shows like that for sure, but would love if get a chance... love experimenting on anything....

Well, the story goes on... I am on a cooking spree again here in chennai.... May be I will consider a special blog on my recipes... Well, that will take a while... Till then whoever reading it I have one thing to say... 'Welcome Home, enjoy the food...'

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pic above : one of my spl chicken recipes...

I do miss being 'myself'....

The summer is long gone... no trace of rain... isn't the time to dash out and enjoy the world, 'cos its in the best of all forms... Technically yeah... but its just the lazy me... lazy lazy me...

No jogging, no games.... no outing, I surprise myself... It's not the real me.... I miss being myself.... May it's the change of place... It's just too bad to say again and again 'i miss Hyderabad'... its an insult to the Chennaites... I should have explored more of this city... instead i stay inside and say 'i miss.....'

I was really motivated a couple of days back to start jogging again (one month of football season really made wake up late everyday).... even kept the shoes outside... the alarm when it rang; all i remember is banging with a pillow....

Oh, its really bad, worse.... I need to get back to my real self.... need some adventure....that will bring me back all the energy.... hope i can find that soon....

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pic above: wildlife here in IIT.... beauty aren't they??!!!

Crazy crazy abt football??

Crazy??? Am I really??? Surprisingly I am not as I was a couple of weeks back...

The world cup started indeed really slow... set high hopes on teams like England; and what a flop show it was.... My favs at the beginning were England and Argentina... now sticking only to the Argentinians.... though it was indeed a disappointing first match for them (expected atleast a 4-0 from them)....

These days my facebook home page is like an news net's sports home page, lol... it's awesome... but i dont think every1 is enjoying all the matches...

I've put a handful of matches only as 'must watch' untill the quarters.... and i am eagerly waiting for that...

Heat... sweat... and sleepless nights....

That's all I can tell when someone calls and asks me how am I doing here in chennai.... The heat is too much for me to bear... I cant really find my real spirit/self from the time i landed here...

I can't remember a single night i slept properly (except for the cyclone affected week)...

I love tea... now i cant even think of having my favorite mid-night tea break... i will be sweating like rain in monsoon...

Still counting down for the end of summer... so that i can walk free.... take some snaps of this beautiful campus (betw, the campus is really beautiful...)

It's a long way to go till I can enjoy a cool movie time in my room sipping a cup of tea.... ahhh... i really miss tea...

How I hate summer....

MOVING ON....

Its been a long time in blogger... i seeing my last post was in March, 2009... It was indeed a long time ago...

Time has passed and lots of things changed inbetween.... had to say good bye to my home, Hyderabad... It was more painful than leaving my home first time to hostel... The amount of influence Hyderabad or HCU was on me was immense... Cant forget the train ride from hyderabad to kerala; sitting in train struggling to hide the tears... remembering the last few wonderful weeks i had, the football season, farewells... parties...

Now; uprooted from Hyderabad, I am in Chennai... the hottest place i have ever been in India (i am saying this because i never experienced Delhi summer, lucky to be there only during winter)...

Things are really different here... though the campus atmosphere is no different from hcu, i do miss the campus hangouts... gops... shop com... masid banda.... and dont forget the lakes and rocks.... The fact that I landed here in the wrong time; summer make me miss hyd more than ever... It was difficult... difficult indeed to gulp the fact that my fun days in hyderabad was over... I have to start over somewhere somewhere... have to move on...

Everyday, when I was home in kerala, i used to tell myself, 'don't look back at the closed door... 'cos there are many opened doors infront'.....

I am still struggling, struggling to adjust, struggling to blend in... struggling with the weather, the food... it may take a while... I may have to make many compromises... but i know i can survive with less fun... 'cos that's what life is all about... MOVING ON....